Tag Archives: sex

The Affair

I made you click on this blog post, didn’t I?

Joking aside, today I am here to recommend the TV Series, The Affair which is currently on the third season.

the-affair

Although not as popular as other series which everyone seems to be talking about for months on end, this TV Series is a breath of fresh air in terms of originality. As its name portrays, the story revolves around two affairs, but the story alternates between point of views of different characters. Each one hour episode is split in two, and as the viewers, we are left to make our own choices – on who’s saying the truth.

This series, is not for the fainthearted. It is not intended to be an easy series to watch, in fact, itย explores the emotional and psychological effects on those who have had the affair and the people around them. It is passionate and messy, as you see the characters work through their anger, grief and a hope for true love.

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Friendzone Galore

So, we have all heard about the infamous friendzone…

Women are rather experts in this, and men are up there all the time. I suppose it is the worst place to be for most men, and women are at ease because they have yet another platonic friend to talk to and spend time with.

In reality, even if men do not admit this, it is a struggle for them to be just friends with someone who they find attractive. Research most often than not says that men cannot be friends with someone they fancy. I guess my male readers can give their HONEST opinion about this. ๐Ÿ™‚

I am the kind of girl, that when I meet a man, I figure out my intentions quickly. Whether the feeling is reciprocated or not; that is another thing… but to this date, I have never dated any of my best or closest male friends which in my eyes are my brothers. Having said that, I know a few rare occasions where a girlfriend of mine has fallen for her best friend.

silence

Tips on avoiding the friendzone:

  1. Always make your intentions clear
    Okay, I do not mean that when you mean someone you like, you just tell them “I want you to be my girlfriend”; but… if you like someone, although you do your best to get to know them, you would also flirt to test the waters. If the girl flirts back, then this is an indication that she likes you, there’s potentially an opportunity for you to be more than just friends.ย  Do not become her doormat, we do not feel sexually attracted to these kind of men. Make the girl blush, compliment her!
  2. Ask her out ASAP!
    As much as it makes sense for you to get to know your potential date and partner, do not wait weeks, or worse months to do something about it. Some girls do not like playing games, especially those who are mature and are interested in serious relationships. They’d give you some time, but the chances are that other opportunities arise, and in that case if another guy asks before you, she will say yes and forget all about you.
  3. Don’t talk to her when she is with her friends
    If she invites you to spend time with her and her friends, it is most likely not because she wants to introduce you to her group of friends as her someone special, but because you are friendzoned. Avoid these occasions until after you start dating. Spending alone time with her, gives you more opportunities to show your interest and intentions. If she avoids being alone with you like the plague, this means that she knows what you are trying to do, and she is trying to spur your the embarrassment.
  4. Don’t let her vent and complain with you about other guys
    This is probably the most obvious indication that the woman in your life is going to friendzone you. It is not your job to listen to her problems with men; she has her girlfriends for this. This is in no way intimacy, and remember – we do not live in a fairy-tale world where a girl will suddenly realise she has been dating assholes and that her one love is you.
  5. Don’t be afraid of rejection
    The idea of being rejected is terrifying for both genders. It is most likely that a friendship cannot be leveraged into romance. You are better off being rejected while you are getting to know each other, rather than after you spent so much time together. A rejection at the very beginning could be turned into friendship, but a rejection once your are friendzoned is very awkward, and the probability is that you stop talking to each other altogether. On top of that, think about all that time and effort and possibly money wasted on someone who is not interested in you.

Would you choose a Mr. Big or an Aidan?

In the past days, due to lack of new series in Summer, I have restarted to watch Sex and the City. My favourite character of the series is Carrie Bradshaw, for tons of reasons. She is a writer, she has curly hair, she is stylish and most of all she got brains! Despite all this, she had so many heartbreaks, her life being a roller coaster of adventures and disappointment; a rather realistic life if you ask me.

I’m in the third season at the moment, and she has just met Aidan, the guy who makes furniture for a living, the guy who she feels so at ease around, and their relationship is just plain sailing; easy. She starts to compare this relationship to her 5 minute long relationship with Mr. Big. Realising there is no drama in her current love life, she starts searching for defects, brainstorming on what is wrong with Aidan… What could he be hiding from her? She gets paranoid, she gets frustrated. She wakes up in the middle of the night wondering. She is so used to living on the edge, fighting to get something done her way that finding a guy who is willing to compromise and who is very understanding pressures her into doubting herself and the future of their relationship.

aidan_mrbig

We all had a Mr. Big in our life at some point;

  • Someone who doesn’t listen
  • ย Someone who doesn’t care of the things which are important to you
  • Someone who never bothers to organise or plan any activities for the both of you
  • Someone who is full of excuses (aka full of shit!)
  • Someone who wouldn’t want to join you in work or family functions…

Someone who you should never be with, yet for some unknown reason you fall for him deeply, and despite what your friends and family say… you hold on, even if barely, until everything falls apart, and your heart is shattered into million pieces.

And then you learn, you learn that you should find yourself an Aidan; one who is worthy of your time, effort and most of all your heart!

My question is this – why do we all need a Mr. Big before we can settle down for what we truly deserve? A true romantic; low on drama but enough to get your blood pumping… a gentleman.

What do you want in life?

There it is – possibly one of the biggest questions you can ask yourself, and the people around you.

If you were to ask me, it is very difficult to not know what you want in life.

Okay, I am not expecting you to have it all planned out, or to know every single step of the way, but surely you know where you want to end up, realistically speaking. I don’t think there’s any person in the world, who has never thought about this. I mean how could you? Even if you just day dream…. Everyone has plans… Maybe for some, it is just hard to admit or to share with others. But they are there; at the back of your mind.

I mean…

  • Who would want to end up doing the same first job over and over againย for the rest of his life?
  • Who wants to live with his parents for ever and ever?
  • Who doesn’t dream of a better future, or of bettering themselves?

Surely there are things that you want to achieve, be it small or huge… we are the only ones who stand in our way to make things come true. Or perhaps, someone close to you who can’t seem to make up their mind.

Always remember, no pain – no gain. A life without struggles, is not worth living; or having.

Lindemann – Praise Abort (Song review)

Rammstein’s vocalist; Til Lindemann has just release a new song under the name ‘Lindemann’ which is a project he is working on with Peter Tagtgren from Hypocrisy. The name of the song is very controversial, but wait until you watch the music video.

If I had to write what I think about this song, I would say that it is very clever. To me, he is criticising the world and the society we live in as well as the mentality people have.

1. The way Til discusses abort in this song, he is almost comparing abort to a contraceptive method. Because people care about pleasure, and they don’t care about the consequences. And since pleasure comes before pain and before owning to your mistakes, he ponders on the idea, that people would rather turn gay than have more children as the latterย ruins lives. Of course this is an exaggeration, but it is the plain truth.

2. Sex without condoms is more natural, more animalisticย and more fun, so better get on with it. The pigs in the video, imply that these people are pigs.ย This is a common name-calling to people who are dirty, or greedy.

3. The hatred in the lyrics shows whatย people are all about. We hate and we complain.

4. At the end of the video, Till shows love and affection towards the piglet. This to me shows, that the character in the video is just there to showย the truth about humans and their behaviour, and that this is totally separate from the views the singer has on this topic.

5. Till Lindemann actually has children, he is divorced. He raised his eldest daughter for 7 years by himself after which her mother decided to take more of an active role in her life.

The Song:

Thoughts and Comments?

Steffi Advice #4 – 50 Shades of Office Inappropriateness

Dear Steffi,50

I work with another 8 women and we all have read the Fifty Shades of Grey and expressed interest in the book and the movie. Few days before the movie was released in the local cinema, we received an email from our manager inviting us for lunch, drinks and then to watch the movie together. I felt it was weird and that the movie is not work-friendly. Because our manager gets defensive we all decided not to bring this out to him and simply go to the event altogether. How can I explain to him that he crossed a line without creating a chaos in the office?

Shady

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Dear Shady,

Although it is lovely and appreciated to have colleagues which you are friends with, I would think this is awkward especially since the only male figure who attended was your manager. I would not feel comfortable watching this movie with my boss, imagining what he is thinking while watching it, and seeing your reactions to the movie; even if you were taking the piss at the movie, like I did with my group of friends! I guess, if I were in that situation I would have tried to agree with the rest of the colleagues, so together we could decline the offer since it was not an appropriate outing for work. It would have been one step forward towards showing your boundaries and hopefully one step closer for your boss to learn his limits.

Much Love XXX

Steffi Advice #1 – Single and Frustrated

Dear Steffi,

I have been single for a number of years and I am starting to wonder why I have been for so long. Most guys that are interested in me are either nerd looking or those who just wanna have sex and get on with life without me. What do you think am I doing wrong?

Frustrated.

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Dear Frustrated,

Although a number of years might seem to be a long time, it spares you the heart ache of dating someone who you do not have enough interest in. Fill up your time with other things, stop waiting for prince charming. Love comes when you least expect it, or so they say. I have been single for almost a year myself, but I have come into terms with it. There’s nothing wrong with being single. Love yourself, enjoy the freedom. There will be time in your life when you are going to regret not taking advantage of this situation. Travel, read, learn a sport or a hobby, have random chats with strangers, focus on yourself.
I’m sure there are good men out there, he will come to you… or you will come to him; at the right moment, at the right time. Maybe you will have to kiss a few frogs before you find the prince, but remember… everyday you are one step closer.
As much as I don’t want you to give up, I want you to make the most out of your current situation.

Much Love XX

Late-Term Abortion

When I was young, around the innocent age of 12-13 while at school, during our compulsory subject of Religion, we were forced to watch a very detailed and bloody video of a woman during abortion. At such a tender age, I was horrified to watch this, and I think it was wrong for the school to make us see it and what happens to the baby. Continue reading Late-Term Abortion