Tag Archives: goodbye

Coping With The Unfathomable Unfairness Of Loss

When we lose a loved one, it can be like finding yourself in an emotional maelstrom. At first, shock can keep you from feeling anything besides on edge. We expect to feel the floodgates open and a lot of sadness but there is also anger and frustration. It can feel incredibly unfair, and that feeling can fester inside us, driving us to bad habits and real emotional health problems that can hard to break from. Here are a few ways that we can start to cope with the uglier side of loss.

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Take some time but don’t shut yourself away

If you’re not very used to opening yourself up, you might want to not appear so vulnerable before others. What’s more, you might feel like you’re surrounded by people following a loss and you simply have no time to think. If you need a break, ask for one and take time to yourself. However, your friends can be a great source of strength. Find someone you trust and talk out your emotions. Being unable to express them can make you unable to process them too. Even if your friend isn’t sure how they can help, having someone listen can be a great deal of help.

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Find what closure you can

If a loss is left without addressing the cause at all, it can make you feel particularly helpless. This happens, in particular, if it was someone else’s fault. If someone is responsible, then holding them to account with help of services like the Law Office of William W. Hurst, LLC can genuinely help. Money will never make up for a loss so deeply and keenly felt. However, ensuring that the right parties are held responsible can make it feel like they haven’t simply gotten away with it. You can have some closure and know that you got justice for your loved one. Otherwise, that injustice might weigh on your mind for a long time.

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Celebrate their life in your own way

Funerals and memorials are important ceremonies for processing the loss of a loved one, as well as celebrating their life. However, for those closest to them, it can feel incomplete. You may not be able to have the emotional closure you need or to feel like you have had a personal goodbye with such a public procedure. In that case, consider having your own memorial for them. You can follow some of the suggestions at Usurns Online, such as planting a tree for them or creating a keepsake pack for them. Others may choose to wear something in remembrance or even get a tattoo. Making your own memorial for them can make it feel like you’ve done a little more to honor them and to keep their memory living in your own mind.

Losing a loved one always feels cruel, unjustified, and unfair. However, it’s important that we take care of ourselves and not lose ourselves in our worst thoughts. Grieving isn’t easy, nor does it feel particularly good even when you’re on the other side. But we can do real harm to ourselves if we dwell.

 

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Farewell, Lukas Podolski

I do not write about football or footballers much, but I am an avid fan of the German national team since the age of 15. That is almost half my life now! Last night was a sad night, as it was Lukas Podolski’s last international game.

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Lukas Podolski cheering after scoring his last goal in his final International Game. What a star!

Born on the 4th of June, 1985, Lukas will be 32 this year. Although he was born in Poland, he has German nationality, which allowed him to play for the German national team.  As a youth, he started off his career in Cologne. He later on joined Bayern Munich, then returned to his home town in Cologne. In 2012 he signed with Arsenal for a fee of £11,000,000. This is the club, together with Cologne in which he shined the most. Currently he is still playing with Galatasaray, a turkish football club, with a salary of around £2,500,000 each year.

He was capped by the German National team in 2004, and since then he became the third most capped player in Germany history, with 130 caps, and also the third highest goalscorer in German history, with 49 goals. In 2013, Podolski scored the fastest goal in German history; he scored after only 9 seconds in a friendly game against Ecuador.

After the Euro Cup 2016, Podolski announced his retirement from international football in order to focus on his family life. He married Monika Puchalski in 2011, and together they have a son, aged 8 (born 2008).

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I have watched Podolski’s career closely with the national team and he has been one of my favourite players. Last night’s win against England would not have happened if it wasn’t for his unbelievable winning goal. What a tribute, and a great way to finish his career with the German team!

Watch the goal here:

Watch his top 10 goals below:

Happy Birthday to Me

Today is my 29th birthday.

It is only one year until I’m 30! When I say it like this, it sounds scary… I am growing old! Luckily I have a lot of older friends, so I do not feel too bad about it! Haha 😉

I am not much of a birthday person. As much as I enjoy the fact that family and close friends remember the day I was born, I do not crave the need to do something special on a day like this. (We age on a daily basis not on a yearly basis!) In fact, I am not too comfortable being in the center of attention. I would rather open up a bottle of wine, snuggle up on the couch and enjoy a good movie. If only it was not this warm right now in Malta….!

Having said that, this coming year I will try to be happy for what I have achieved, and where my life is taking me, rather than focusing on the fact that I am growing older. I will attempt to be thankful for who I have become, and welcome the coming year with arms wide open. I am grateful to those who have supported me, and listened to me complain about what was bringing me down. I appreciate especially those who pushed me to do well, change jobs and not to lose hope! When I stop thinking about how unlucky I am at times, I come to realise how good it feels to be alive, how I survived so many difficulties and heartache this year, and because of this, I have become a stronger person. More than ever, I know what I want in life and I am determined to not let anyone get in the way of myself following my heart and my dreams.

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Hello 29, let’s kick some ass!

I am going through changes…

Five more days, until I say goodbye to Betsson.
Yes, you heard things right.
I am leaving Betsson Group. 

After almost 4 years, I have decided to move on to a new challenge, to a job which will hopefully take me where I want to be. For years, I’ve expressed my unheard wishes, so I decided to take my future in my own hands, sort it out myself.

With a grunt, I shall leave behind, the company I have worked for the longest, and some of the best colleagues I ever had the pleasure to work with. Truth be told, all my closest work mates bar one, have moved on to another job role before me, so I am not too displeased with my current situation. Besides, friends should find a way to communicate and to meet up, so let’s see the outcome of this little experiment 🙂

So what will happen of me, and of SteffiSays?

I will be taking a much needed 4 weeks off, out of which, I will spend 1 week in North Wales and 2 weeks travelling (Roadtripping, baby!). Right after, I will do some house maintenance, and will start working in my new job in the fourth week of September. SteffiSays will stay, there’s no way I will abandon my personal blog which has served me so well in the past 2 years!

Excited?
Hell yes! 

Although for the time being I will not say much about my new job, I am ecstatic for this opportunity, and for a company to believe in me and see my potential. I believe that in my new role I will be able to make a lot of changes and positive differences to drive the company in the right direction and to the next level. So, CHEERS!

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Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant of the day.

Quality over quantity, always.
Be it material things or matters of the heart…

When I cannot think, that things can sink any lower, here I am getting disappointed again.

No, this is not another complaint about my love life, because this is not the case. I assure you!
This is about the so called friends.

As if it is not difficult enough to meet good, loyal, trustworthy people… I mean, I would know… I am not a very sociable person, in fact I would rather be around a few people than a group of loud beings. I have always preferred having a best friend rather than a lot of friends. I am the kind of person, who would rather have one person to count on, than many who don’t.

Every now and then, I try to organise a get together, to see some friends that I haven’t seen in a while. It is difficult to find a time and a day when everyone can join, and we always end up compromising, either regarding who should attend or the location, or the budget. I guess, that is okay, as long as things work out. What sucks is, that you put your heart in it, and since it is agreed upon several weeks before, there is always some sort of expectation for it. Then things get cancelled, and you are back to square one.

Is this normal, or do these things happen to just me?
When the only person who tries to solve things is yourself, is it the beginning of the end? Should I call it quits, before they quit me?

Sometimes you have to give up on people
not because you don’t care,
but because they don’t.

The world will NEVER forget

I have tried, to write something on what has happened this Friday in Paris, and what has happened on Thursday in Beirut, but I have realised that no words of mine would be enough.

Until, today I stumbled on the words of Isobel Bowdery, a 22-year-old who was at the rock concert in Bataclan in Paris. Here, is what she had to say, after the ordeal she had to endure, with other hundreds of people, of which some did not make it out alive;

“you never think it will happen to you. It was just a friday night at a rock show. the atmosphere was so happy and everyone was dancing and smiling. and then when the men came through the front entrance and began the shooting, we naiively believed it was all part of the show. It wasn’t just a terrorist attack, it was a massacre. Dozens of people were shot right infront of me. Pools of blood filled the floor. Cries of grown men who held their girlfriends dead bodies pierced the small music venue. Futures demolished, families heartbroken. in an instant. Shocked and alone, I pretended to be dead for over an hour, lying among people who could see their loved ones motionless.. Holding my breath, trying to not move, not cry – not giving those men the fear they longed to see. I was incredibly lucky to survive. But so many didn’t. The people who had been there for the exact same reasons as I – to have a fun friday night were innocent. This world is cruel. And acts like this are suppose to highlight the depravity of humans and the images of those men circuling us like vultures will haunt me for the rest of my life. The way they meticoulsy aimed at shot people around the standing area i was in the centre of without any consideration for human life. It didn’t feel real. i expected any moment for someone to say it was just a nightmare. But being a survivor of this horror lets me able to shed light on the heroes. To the man who reassured me and put his life on line to try and cover my brain whilst i whimpered, to the couple whose last words of love kept me believing the good in the world, to the police who succeded in rescuing hundreds of people, to the complete strangers who picked me up from the road and consoled me during the 45 minutes I truly believed the boy i loved was dead, to the injured man who i had mistaken for him and then on my recognition that he was not Amaury, held me and told me everything was going to be fine despite being all alone and scared himself, to the woman who opened her doors to the survivors, to the friend who offered me shelter and went out to buy new clothes so i wouldnt have to wear this blood stained top, to all of you who have sent caring messages of support – you make me believe this world has the potential to be better. to never let this happen again. but most of this is to the 80 people who were murdered inside that venue, who weren’t as lucky, who didnt get to wake up today and to all the pain that their friends and families are going through. I am so sorry. There’s nothing that will fix the pain. I feel priviledged to be there for their last breaths. And truly beliving that I would join them, I promise that their last thoughts were not on the animals who caused all this. It was thinking of the people they loved. As i lay down in the blood of strangers and waiting for my bullet to end my mere 22 years, I envisioned every face that I have ever loved and whispered I love you. over and over again. reflecting on the highlights of my life. Wishing that those i love knew just how much, wishing that they knew that no matter what happened to me, to keep belieivng in the good in people. to not let those men win. Last night, the lives of many were forever changed and it is up to us to be better people. to live lives that the innocent victims of this tragedy dreamt about but sadly will now never be able to fulfil. RIP angels. You will never be forgotten.”

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No words were edited. Sharing them here is out of respect and a way to remember what has happened… As yet again, this is a tragedy which the whole of Europe and the rest of the world will not forget.

RIP to the lives lost.

Goodbye Revenge…

Goodbye Revenge… You have served me well…

I have been dreading this day for a long time now, but unfortunately good things (and bad too!) come to an end…

I think, that the final episode was very well balanced. There was a lot of suspense, with Amanda fleeing captivity, and looking for Victoria. Amanda’s father shooting Victoria, and the latter shoots Amanda almost as she was taking her last breath. Killing them both, would have been very dramatic, but I think a lot of viewers would have been very, very angry.

Amanda points her gun at Victoria, who says, “I died long before you were born. This is just a formality.”
Amanda points her gun at Victoria, who says, “I died long before you were born. This is just a formality.”

David Clarke dies, while watching snow on his front porch… Although it’s sad, his daughter lived to honour his legacy… with infinite love.

Amanda did get her happy ending… She married Jack Porter, adopted a puppy just like the one Jack had during their childhood… and sailed away to an unknown destination…

And they lived happily ever after..
And they lived happily ever after..

Nolan Ross… feels so useless when the whole revenge was over…. but Amanda never stops surprising us… The series very last scene is an unknown character walking to Nolan showing him a newspaper… his mother is about to go on trial and she’s innocent…. There dear Nolan, purpose found!

Nolan Ross spinoff? Yes please…