Tag Archives: scary

Take the leap

I have probably wrote about this topic about a gazillion times, but hey ho… I am trying to understand myself better… and at the same time I am wondering if it is just me who’s like this, or whether it is something which is more common than I realise.

I am the kind of person, who puts others before her; be it their needs, their happiness… you name it. I try to always be there, to listen, to help, to support, to give others my two cents. To help them on their way to goodness, fulfillment… joy to the world they say!

And in return, I neglect myself. I put myself through shit.. through disappointment, through pain… just in the name of seeing others doing better. No, I don’t regret being there for friends, I love putting a smile on people’s  faces. But what about me?

Yes, what about me?

Okay, I don’t want to sound selfish… but this is definitely not right. I feel stressed, worn out… at times beyond repair.

My guess is, I am the problem.

I need to learn how to let go…. let go of people and things which are bad for me, who don’t deserve half the time and attention I give them. I need to stop people from abusing my generosity. I need to learn to be okay with just being me, and in my own company and shoes.

I should stop hiding behind other people’s problems and dive into fixing what is wrong with my life and myself. I have been here before, I take on more than I can keep up with, just so I don’t have to think about what needs to get done in my life; to stop focusing on what I am scared to face… to stop working on my dreams, just because I am scared to fail… yet again.

I know that, everything I want is on the other side of fear.

So, why can’t I take the leap?

I know what I want, so why do I do this to myself? Why do I punish myself so much?

More on this topic, here.

 

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Reflection

So this morning I was in work, and while I was sipping my coffee and working on my weekly reports, I hear the mention of a crashing plane. Being still not wide awake, at such an ungodly hour on a Monday morning, it took me some time until it registered in my head that there was an actual plane crash.

I was even more shocked when I Googled the words “plane crash” and I saw the word MALTA.

I have never in my 29 years of life, heard of such incidents on Maltese shores. I must say, this has shaken me to the core. I got goosebumps all over as soon as I read the article, and even more so when I watched the video. Two explosions, fire everywhere, people crying as they witness what has happened. It was crazy. Heartbroken.

There were no survivors, and if you watch the video, you can understand why.

In moments like these, I can’t help but reflect on my life. How short life is, how unpredictable it is. As a frequent flyer myself, tragedies like these although they won’t convince me to stay bound to Malta forever, make me realise how fragile we are, how although rare such things happen – even if it never occur to us that it will happen to us, or someone close to us.

With this in my mind, I urge you to hold on to your loved ones a little bit tighter tonight and to not be afraid to love and be honest always. Life is precious, and once our heart stops beating that is it.

My deepest and sincere condolences to the families of the lost souls.
Rest in peace.

Compliments

I am not a person who accepts compliments easily and for various reasons
– Lack of self confidence
– People are more often than not, not genuine, and compliment you out of sarcasm, or simply to compliment them back
– Just awkward, especially when it is a random unknown person

Lets take an example of what has happened today. I got home right after work, 15 minutes before the shops close, I realised I forgot to buy something I needed for the day so I dressed up in the first thing I found nearby and went out. In the next 10 minutes, I was “complimented” by 3 strangers; two regarding my hair, and another regarding my general appearance.
In my eyes (or in my head, because I didn’t look in the mirror!), these adjectives sounded like they were untrustworthy, and were simply said in attempt to get my attention.

When I am feeling upset, or perhaps I am having a bad day, these words give me a bit of a boost… but on average I pretend that I have not heard a thing and keep walking. Well, even if I were to accept such words, should I just keep muttering thank you to  each and every non-creepy looks legit enough person?

 

Hunters; The Alien Invasion

When it comes to aliens, what could be scarier than aliens who look like humans? Aliens that are able to integrate well into the society – be it work, relationships, marriage, children… You wouldn’t be able to tell human from alien, and you can go on for years and decades not knowing that your partner is abnormal. Until suddenly, they receive a message, go mad and kill everyone in sight.

Sure a strange looking alien adds up to the scare/horror factor, but psychologically the thrill works out much better when you do not know if the person in-front of you is human or not.

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This is just a glimpse of the Sci-Fi TV Series I am watching, which goes by the name Hunters. The title is not a reference to the humans who are hunting the aliens; but rather Hunters are the new species in the world.

The TV Series is a good adrenaline rush, even if it was not made with the highest of budgets. The plot is great, especially when you get to episode 5 and I cannot wait to see what happens next. There are some twists which are a bit predictable, but most are not.

The TV Series is based on the book Alien Hunter written by Whitley Strieber.

The biggest shame is that this series was cancelled last month – I never understand why series are not given a chance to evolve before they are terminated. This definitely did have a future if promoted well and to the right audience.

Why you should watch Stranger Things

It has  been quite some time since I have made a TV Series recommendation but  in the past days I have come across two which are worth your time and consideration. Today, I shall talk about the much hyped new Netflix series “Stranger Things.

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It has been in my to-do or, to-watch list since it was released, but I knew, that since it was just an 8-episode run, I had to watch them in one sitting. This means, it was ideal for an afternoon during the weekend, which is what I did on Saturday afternoon.

With the fact that Netflix have already announced a season 2, this sounded promising; now more than ever.

Before I give you a brief about this astounding, fast paced AND exiting series, here goes the official trailer:

 

Back to the point now, here’s some fun facts to help you get started on this series:

  • Winona Ryder is the main actress in this TV Series
  • The story-line is based in the 80s, so expect that some great music throughout – I was singing along!
  • The story is about a young boy’s disappearance in a very small town
  • The series is spooky, adventurous and very pop-culture in its own way
  • Supernatural vibe,which is THANKFULLY not over done
  • Have I mentioned creepy monsters yet?
  • Don’t worry about the fact that the cast is mostly children and teenagers – they have been very well selected.
  • The season finale gives us some answers yet leaves us in awe of what is coming

Questions:

  • Eleven. What happened to the ten before?
  • Will, will he be okay?
  • Is Chief Hopper legit?

May I just say that the hype on this series was for once very well deserved?

 

All Hallows’ Eve and Jagermeister

This last Saturday marked the final night out before I travel back to Wales, and it being my favourite holiday of the year, Halloween, I made sure it ended with a bang.

It was the first time I have ever experimented with fake blood, and I underestimated it. Never realised it was so runny and that it so much takes time (was it 15 mins, or 30 minute?) to dry! It kept moving and dripping everywhere. Patience was running low as I kept worrying that I might ruin my dress, but luckily all is good when it ends well.

Originally, I wanted to dress up like some sort of a goth-zombie Jessica Rabbit. I thought it would be funny, since a lot of people pulled my leg about me pulling off that character. Unfortunately the wig I had in mind never made it, so I improvised with the only red and black wig (thus the goth part of the costume) I had available.

When I finished off the make up and added the blood, I looked more like some sort of vampire rather than anything else. BUT I was still rather pleased about the outcome. Especially when people asked me whether my wig was my real hair.

Some photos of the outcome and the night out itself:

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Pretty Little Liars – Charles

Hold and behold, what amazing season finale we had on Tuesday night (or in my case, since I’m in Europe… yesterday!).

I am still quite speechless about what I have seen, and I will most definitely have to rewatch the episode once more in the days to come. The episode was intense, I felt breathless a couple of times. I was so worried that one of the girls or one of their boyfriends is A!

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So, you can imagine my relief when I figured out the anagram…. Charles! And not just Charles… He’s a DiLaurentis! At one point while I was watching one of the earliest seasons of Pretty Little Liars, I was quite convinced that Alison had a twin; but it never gone through my mind that Jason could have a twin. The story was all the time about Alison, and Jason was never really the focus of the plot.

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So…. my thoughts on the episode itself and the future epsiodes:

  • If Jason has a twin… Spencer has another brother…
  • We have met Charles before… but where?
  • A’s doll house… what’s up with that?
  • How long have the girls been stuck there? It looks like they new their way around the house by end of the episode… Does that suggest that within that 45 minutes, days have gone by?
  • Mona is blonde (yuck!) and alive
  • Andrew Campbell, is he in favour of the girls or against?
  • Emily and Alison… will there still be sparks between them?

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