Tag Archives: recover

The Relationship Masks Are Slipping, But What Can You Do If You Don’t Like What’s Underneath?

The early days of a relationship are always a show of sorts. We put on our best faces for dates and try to paint ourselves in the brightest light possible. If we really like someone, we may even change our views to please them or tell white lies about our true natures.

But, when the relationship gets underway, that mask has to slip. In many ways, this is a good thing. When you let down that guard, true love can come in. Sure, the promise of your ‘perfect man’ might have caught your attention in the first place. But, you may not know he’s ‘the one’ until you seem him at a weak moment.

That said, this slipping of masks is often a painful process, and can be fraught with unpleasant surprises. It may be that there’s a habit or quirk to your partner’s personality which you really don’t like. When you think about it, it makes sense that they would hide this. Who goes on a date and grandstands their worst personality traits? Over time, you may come to realize that your seemingly gentle boyfriend has a nasty temper. Or, perhaps that attentive man spends more time on his phone than you first thought. The issue which makes itself known may be even severe, like a gambling addiction, or something like depression.

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Sadly, this period is where many relationships end. And, believe it or not, that’s rarely due to the realisation that Mr Perfect is only human. In fact, most of the time, our attempts to change our partners put the nail in the romance coffin. You know how it is; you look past his temper because you think you can cure him of it. You assume that, because he’s with you now, his depression should evaporate.

But, here’s a horrible truth; love isn’t an instant fix. While it is a crucial part of life, it can’t just clear the way of problems. What’s more, approaching a relationship with thoughts of changing a person is the worst thing you can do. It suggests that you love your idea of them, not who they are. And, we all know that love is about accepting someone for their true selves. In fact, the only real time change would be the best route open to you is if this bad personality trait puts your partner at risk. Otherwise, you should attempt to help your partner when you notice these issues. It isn’t easy, but it may be the only way to keep your relationship healthy. And, we’re going to look at a few of the ways you can achieve it.

Recognize their triggers

For the most part, traits like these come with triggers. It’s likely certain things set off that raging temper, for instance. Equally, there may be certain situations which drive a gambler to hit the casino. As their partner, it’s your responsibility to notice. Do this without comment or judgement. Observe and accept the situation. Then, do what you can to help them avoid situations like these where possible. If you see your raging man getting mad, grab his hands and do a quick dance around the room, or something equally fun. This will distract his attention, as well as reinforcing your relationship. You may also notice that he’s more liable to gamble when worried about money. If you’re at the stage where you’re living together, do what you can to keep finances in check, or discuss ways to make more money. Again, this will help with communication, as well as distraction. It may be best, though, not to outwardly tell him about the triggers you’ve noticed. Making him aware of your observations could turn to a trigger in itself. He’ll also then be able to tell when you’re distracting attention, and that could drive him further towards the places you don’t want him to go.

Point him down a better path

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This step is tricky. Get it wrong, and you could slip into the territory of trying to change your partner. But, if you take your time here, you may find that you can point him down a better path. The trick here is not to speak in definites. Merely make suggestions which you think would improve a situation. Do this subtly, so that your man doesn’t feel you’re preaching to him. It could be that leave a program on television discussing ways to deal with anger. Or, you may want to look at sites like Casino Guru which could at least recommend reliable casinos if he is going to gamble. If mental illness is the issue, talk to him about his treatment options. Through discussions, he may find he settles on a new approach which could work well. And, you can achieve all this without ever directly attempting to change the way your lover behaves. Instead, he’ll come to associate you as a reassuring presence who helps him make his own decisions.

Focus on the future

Focusing on the future is always a good idea in a relationship. If things start to stagnate, it can lead to frustration and disillusionment. But, it becomes even more critical in cases like these. If, for instance, your partner is depressed, a focus on your plans as a couple could be a considerable incentive for recovery. If it’s a mutual decision, a determination to have kids in the future could be all it takes to encourage your partner to get help. Equally, this could encourage them to face up to addictions, be they gambling or anything else. The knowledge of future parenthood could even help with anger management problems. After all, no one wants to be that parent who shouts all the time. Bear in mind that it’s essential you let your partner lead conversations like these. If they aren’t ready to discuss this kind of thing, pressure could push them further into a negative place. But, if you’re both in the same headspace here, the future could be the best tonic.

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And Relax: How To Create An In-House Spa Experience

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We all love those weekends away at a spa. Whether you take your Mom or go with a group of girls, there’s nothing more relaxing than being treated and pampered for a few nights. But busy schedules, money and getting everyone together at the same time doesn’t make it easy to treat ourselves to a lot of them. So why not bring those blissful spa vibes into your own home as well. With a few clever ideas you can create an in-house spa that will ensure you feel relaxed every weekend. Here are some ideas to get you started.

An At-Home Steam Shower

If budget permits and it’s time you renovated your bathroom, why not consider investing in a plush steam shower at home? With advanced technology, it has never been easier to install a steam shower or steam bath into your property. Steam showers can include overhead rain showers, hand-held showers, built-in music, LED  lighting, and even foot massagers. And of course, they enable you to create a hot steamy retreat in your bathroom. Jet systems and steam generators will create the ultimate in-house Turkish bath experience. Cutting edge technology will allow you to feel revived and refreshed in the morning and let you wind down and relax at night. Benefits of a steam shower include improved circulation and recovery after exercise. They also promote healthier, clearer skin by opening up the pores.

A Personal Massage Chair

For the ultimate relaxing experience why not invest in a massage chair for your home? Shiatsu chairs offer everything from Yoga and Chiro programs to Swedish and Shiatsu massage treatments. You may never need the services of a spa again! They are a great way to loosen up muscles and unwind in the evening or on the weekend. If you don’t have the space for a massage chair, you could consider getting a massage cushion instead. Many cushions also come with heat facilities, vibrations and built in rollers too. These are perfect for those times when your muscles need kneading, and there’s no time to book in for a treatment.

Luxury Products

Of course, no in-house spa would be complete without spa experience products. Brands such as Elemis and Decleor offer many super luxurious products that are also used in their very own spas. Decleor products are focused on essential oils, skincare rituals, and innovative treatments. And they also happen to smell delicious too. So if you want the scent of a spa in your home, it’s always worth investing in some high-end products too. Choose everything from bubble baths to body scrubs and body milks to facial night balms for the ultimate in-house spa experience. If you are doing a facial treatment, always keep a few hot towels close by for wiping off oils, just like they do at the spa. Simply soak the towels in hot water then wring them out before use. Adding essential oils to the water will also add an extra spa-like touch to your treatment. For lots more beauty tips follow the click.

Ambiance

To top of your at home spa don’t forget to include a fluffy bathrobe, Egyptian cotton towels and a pair of sleek slippers too. And soothing music and scented candles go a long way to creating a blessed out ambiance too. Engage your senses with relaxing scents, soft touches and calming sounds to feel like you are in a plush spa, even when you’re at home.

The Librarians [Series Review]

If you clicked on this blog post and you are worried about any spoilers, rest assured… you are safe!

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The story is about a number of people with special skills such as (world class thief, mathematician etc) who have teamed up together to form a team of Librarians in order to solve impossible mysteries, recover powerful artifacts, and fight against supernatural threats.

As one could imagine, this series is all about adventure as well as some humour here and there. The Librarians meet several well known characters such as Sherlock Holmes, Dorian Grey, Moriarty (in several episodes actually!), Frankenstein’s monster… and the list goes on.

At the moment the series is airing the second season, which means there are quite some episodes to watch and devour 😉

You can start off by watching the two trailers down below: