Tag Archives: trust

My articles / researches, My Life, Steffi Says

Do you follow your heart or your head?

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When you’re at cross roads… should you follow your heart or your head?

There are situations in life which make you struggle; make you unsure of your existence or what to do next. Should you stay or should you leave?
It is at moments like these when I wonder what to do… Should I follow my heart or my head?

Neither of the choices are ideal.

I think there were not many situations or experiences in my life, where I had a straight answer – where my heart and head were in agreement.

In the sense that;head-vs-heart-sign
– with change comes doubt
– with change comes insecurity
– with change comes something new

Is it the right choice?
Will I benefit from this?
Will I regret it?
Should I try harder?

Sometimes, you can find “comfort” in the devil you know – at the very least, you are familiar with what you currently have in your life; there is no fear of the un-known.

Thoughts?

Advice, Steffi Says

Steffi Advice #5: Will you settle down for much less than you deserve?

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engagement ring

Dear Steffi,

This year I will be 30 years old, and I think it is high time I settle down, get married, have a family of my own. I have been seeing the same man for just over a year and I think we are old enough to take our relationship to the next level, since we both share the same goal of having kids. I will propose to him this summer. Although he is not the man I thought I’d be with, he has proven to be loyal and committed. He doesn’t have a good job, but maybe that will change if we get more serious. He says he cares about me but he is not passionate around me. When I tell him my worries or ask for help, he doesn’t do much about them. He doesn’t mistreat me and that is to me, very important. I have been in lots of long relationships but never found someone who wants to have a family with me. Should I risk it all and propose? My friends are not being supportive.

Hard-Headed

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Dear Hard-Headed,

Just like you, I have not been very lucky with all things love and relationships. I have had 3 major relationships, but they all turned to dust after around 3 to 4 years. I spent months wondering what I have been doing wrong, and what could I have possibly done so bad in my life to deserve this; but I have not yet found an answer. So every time, I pulled myself together, and tried again. I’m 28 years old, and I must admit that I am not where I thought I’d me in my love life. But that does not mean that I’d jump the gun as soon as I hear someone saying that they want to get married and have kids. It is currently one of the goals I want to reach, but is he the ideal partner to do it with?

Are you ready to live a life with no passion and no public affection? Have you even thought how this would affect your future children? And he does mistreat you, if he doesn’t listen to you, if he doesn’t help you…. If he doesn’t try to cheer you up when you are down! It is not the words that make up a man, it is his actions. If he doesn’t help you now, when it’s all about you two, how do you expect him to help you when there are little children running about? I wouldn’t call it a family, if there is no respect, no empathy, no affection and no support…

Being a lover of literature and romance, I consider myself to be a very old fashioned person when it comes to love and relationships. I would never settle for someone who doesn’t find time to make me feel special, and the occasional romantic surprise.

Much Love x x x

Crazy Outbursts, My Life, Steffi Says

People.

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I know, the title of this blog post is a little bit out there and a little bit generic, but today, I am in the mood of writing what’s on my mind and that’s about it. This won’t be the most structured post you will read from my end, but it will contain some raw thoughts coming up straight from my brain onto paper.

Why are some people so hard to figure out?

I’m all up for challenges, as I am not one who likes things easy in life (might be because I always work hard to get what I want, and I was never spoon fed), but sometimes you just want things to go your way without a single word or disagreement.

It bothers me when people behave around me (in private) one way… being all funny and goofy and sweet and loyal…. and then in public they are a totally different person. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that they feel comfortable enough around me and trust me enough to show me their soft side, but why all the changes? Why do you have to turn into a cold / inconsiderate / macho beast when with friends?

Is this normal, or is this because one of their personalities is fake, just to lure people in their life?

As if life is a popularity contest.

I know that as a person, I behave different with different people, but mainly because some of my acquaintances do not appreciate certain qualities I have and I’d rather not create chaos and go with the flow. But with people I know, love or consider as friends… I’d be truly myself…. and if you can’t deal with that… it’s your loss.

Thoughts?

Advice, Steffi Says

First Advise / Opinion contact received

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So today I have received the first contact on my website, asking for advice. I am  really happy about this, because it means that random people are coming across my blog, and they are entrusting me in being part of their decision making.

I would like to thank this person, and let them know that I will be replying to their question tomorrow. This delay is so that I can think it through and give you the best answer possible. It will be worth the wait I hope 🙂

If you do have any questions or feedback, please do so by clicking here.