Tag Archives: grow up

Things a’changing

There are days, when I question things about my life, and my choices. Today has been one of these forsaken days. Actually, I have been at it since 3AM, but that is beyond my point.

I was thinking about back in 2011, when I had my first Christmas alone, living far away from my family, friends, and on top of that, in another country – How courageous was I, to take such a big leap, leaving everything and everyone behind!

Before then, I have never lived alone, and I had no idea about the kind of responsibility and effort it entails to live and make ends meet at the end of the day, and month when all bills came crawling up. I have done a great job, and learned a lot from this experience.

When I have moved back to Malta, I was not willing to move back with the family, as I enjoyed my independent life too much to let go of it. So much so, that within a year of renting, I purchased my own property.

Although this made sense financially, this has indirectly tied me to this country without even realising at the time. Now that I have settled down in such a “grown up” lifestyle, it seems to me that I have become more self conscious when taking decisions. And I shall give you an example. This week, I was meant to travel, but my plans fell apart, and I have decided to give up the holiday based on two reasons:
1. I should not travel alone at night
2. Accommodation has risen up in price (it also being Christmas holidays, and included NYE), and a last minute purchase would have costed me my entire savings for my holiday.

If I did not have my house to worry about, and if I were not such a wuss, I would be in the UK right now, enjoying cold weather, possibly fog and snow, and beautiful beautiful scenery. How silly am I? Where has all my self confidence gone? What has tarnished my spirit in such a way?

And if you are wondering why I wrote this and why I am sharing this with my readers, it is because I want to be able to read this whenever I need to, so I do not repeat such thing ever again. And also, to try to keep reminding myself that not all my decisions in the past years have been as bad.

Now to try and live life guilt free… and keep moving forward… >>>

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Dream Job

I have been asked the question of what is my dream job several times. When I was younger, this used to change depending on my moods, or what I was going through. I remember me wanting to be a scientist, and even a hairdresser; until I was told I had to study biology for that. I hated anything that had to do with biology and the dissection of a human or animal. One of my childhood friends had to buy a heart of a cow and cut it in half in one of the lessons. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all up for steaks, but this was to me disgusting.

Then, I wanted to become a teacher because it would mean I get the summer off from work like all the students. Then I started thinking on how bored I would, and how much I despised the summer heat that this didn’t sound like such a good idea either.

Growing up, I decided to get into IT, because, I thought, this would mean, working in peace, and not get distracted constantly by customers and people with questions. A couple years later after my graduation, I can tell you that this was very untrue as stakeholders come and go on a daily basis, and I get bombarded with questions face to face, by email, by chat and what not.

No, my current job is not my dream job.drmjob

But, the more I matured, the more I realised, that IF IT IS SOMETHING I LOVE DOING, AND I’D CALL IT A DREAM… HOW ON EARTH CAN YOU CALL IT A JOB? Isn’t it more like a vacation, a hobby, or a pastime.
This got me thinking further.

Oh, I know!

My dream job would be, traveling from one place to another, photographing, and writing about it… And in turn sharing it with my readers…. Companies would pay me to do this for them, and from my end, I would enjoy one holiday after another for free.
Both of us win right? Adverts, promotion and generating buzz for your country, and traveling experiences for me.
Yes please.